Fat Teacher, Take 2

From teaching college to teaching 5th grade Reading

Hello, friends! I’d say sorry that it’s been so long…but I’m too tired to have that kind of emotional response, lol. I started a new career about 7 weeks ago—teaching 5th grade reading at my neighborhood public school. It has been a wild ride! Let me tell you some of the highlights.

I can do this! For a while before I actually started this job, I didn’t think full-time employment was for me anymore, being disabled after having Covid in 2020. I have some accommodations and a lot of gracious help from my fellow teachers, but I’m actually doing it, and doing it well.

I’ve had nothing but positive feedback from everyone, from administration to students. That is so freaking encouraging. In a society that downplays the importance and value of fat and disabled people, to be seen and heard doing a good job is so rewarding.

I was even named Staff Member of the Week for my district this week, which was an unexpected delight. Here I am with some of my students.

My students are amazing! Yes, they have their struggles, but they are simply a delight—even the more difficult ones. Of course, I have had days where I’m at my wits end with them, but a majority of the time, they surprise me with their thoughtfulness, joy, and curiosity.

What about being fat while teaching? I have to admit, this is the hardest part of teaching, being in a fat body. My students have made innocent comments and have asked innocent questions about my food preferences or why I’m out of breath after doing the stairs, and I do admit, it’s emotionally challenging to respond well in these instances.

We have had conversations about all bodies being good bodies and how wrinkles and gray hair are okay! I know these small and seemingly inconsequential conversations are sowing good seeds, but it’s sometimes hard to remember that in the thick of it.

Some things I’m doing to keep myself grounded in the truth:

1. Practicing peace when fear of rejection rises in me. I cling to the reality of the love I have for myself and the love my family and friends have for me.

2. Repeating my mantras, which I know align with my values. All bodies are good bodies. The purpose of my body is relationship, not perfection. I am enough; I am not too much.

3. Having a blast in a fat body!

Regarding literature and reading, these kids are going to change the world. I’m so honored to be an integral part of their growing and educational journey.

Stories are life!

Amanda Martinez Beck